Nov 14, 2014

O boy!

When you pushed that door opened, my heart skipped a beat
You waved at me while I had already rushed my glaze down
O boy do I know you? the cutest fashionable guy in town
I can't stand your stares, you're so naively hot, I try to stay away
But you take a step toward anytime I move back, I feel so shy
You sit so close I could feel you breath, I want to hide
You try hard to read into my stares, but I'm closed in, awkward
So you  hum and ham: is this just my friend? or boyfriend?
O boy, I wish you were, but I'm not so free, anyway happy
Say my name again and promise we'll meet again, so warm
You wrapped my heart and stole a last stare, see you boy


Sep 7, 2014

Full moon creativity

Bright full moon gifts night owls like me:
Moonlit woods whispered verses to me.
My eyes ceaselessly glued to the firmament,
Anchoring my reality in the present moment.

Seasonal melody

Summer is blue
Cerulean midnight
Azure noon vault
Aquamarine flow
These hues echo
Trance and techno

Winter is dark
Charcoal shadows
Crystal footprints
Inky welkin
Black euphony
Rocks metal tune


Aug 29, 2014

I miss myself

I am a refugee. I want to go home but it does not exist anymore. I miss it so dearly, I can not rest, my eyes are dried from so any tears I cried.
I am both a broken soul and a stranded stranger so we should not expect kindness and understanding from each other. No matter how kind it was to welcome me, it can not compare to the coziest loveliest home I had ever had. It is a rough time in a new world, a world I neither chose nor want.
I had to leave not only dreams, but friends and habits. Anything that anchored me to reality has been wiped out. Do not ask for so many smiles, or you will get anger at your lack of compassion.
I have taken on so many foreign clothes and forgotten so many of my ways that I can not recognize myself any more. I have become my blurred and shapeless shadow on a windy day.


May 2, 2014

smartphones and glassboxes

 I really like how these 2 people are in a tiny glass box. Instead of focusing on the smartphone, let's think deeper into the roots of WHY people need smartphone to 'feel' busy, rather than bored, or connected rather than disconnected.
1. Obviously as more and more people live in big cities rather than small communities in the countryside, they end up living in tiny boxes, called "flats/apartment/student room", they also have to put up with working in tiny boxes: cubicles, little desk in high glass boxes (skyscrapers?), they commute from their home box to their job box, in little boxes named cars, or metro/bus. Even babies are put in boxes: strollers
What can people DO in tiny boxes? they can neither walk, nor run, nor dance, maybe they can go the the big box (mall) and shop. Some people go to an exercise box (the gym) but most people find it too dull, and get bored. Boredom is sourced in the LACK of sensual stimulation of our dull box environment. And to reclaim sensual stimulation, movies, pictures and music is available 24/7 on our smartphones.
2. Freedom, Most fun exercise takes space: football/rugby, swimming, tennis, biking, golfing, etc can neither be done in tiny boxes, nor in big overcrowded ones. People need some space to move, unrestrained, for the same reason a free range chicken is superior to a caged one, people who roam free tend to feel better than boxed ones.
So people feel overcrowded, at least subconsciously, and to regain their personal freedom space, they turn to Internet, social networks, a virtually infinite place where they have all room to be themselves, rather than a number in a box.
3. Even though people may share big overcrowded space like a train wagon at rush hour, there is no feeling of personal relationship because these are fleeting moments and no one can see exactly the same people everyday in one's wagon, bar exceptions (but notice how we tend to get to know each other in this case)
Or those big places, like an open office are an apartment building are divided in small boxes (cubicle, flats), so that people don't interact and don't have to be social, or are discouraged to socialize (for productivity sake). Then again Internet and 'social' networks provide the solution by reconnecting disconnected urban dwellers with each other. It is also interesting to see more and more former city dwellers (like me), who keep connection to urban life (intellectuals, arts, people) through Internet, while moving to the countryside which is geographically disconnected from universities, governments and museums.

Apr 18, 2014


You can't see what I see, you can't feel what I feel but between those lines, you may grasp who we were, once upon a time, before life left us. We are childless souls bound to dirt particles. We are ghost upon Earth, weird wandering demons salvaging wilderness to ornate dangling flesh pieces. Our brightest star, Sun is setting the rhythm of our mental life, up and down with our consciousness.

If I lie to you as much as I lie to myself, you may believe I was real, but I was never oneself. I had been, I was and will always be a heteroclite bundle of feelings fading away and twisted within my memory realm. Those words are anamorphosed by the limited semantic range of my language knowledge and your own, necessarily different understanding.

Anything we feel doesn't absolutely exist, we merely compare now to somewhere before and evaluate how it values against. Sometimes we lack words for it and we forget. Somewhere else we are so profoundly moved we store all our now&here perceptions forever. However it only exists until anyone forgets about it, whether my senile brain or how to interpret those sounds and, or shapes, that we call language.


Mar 25, 2014


"many autistic authors turn to poetry, a form that frees them from constraints of syntax and story and permits them to focus on the perceptual qualities of the images represented and the phonological structure applied. In this domain of expression, autistic differences can manifest not as abnormal deficits but as abnormal skills". Belmonte (2008)