Nov 17, 2011


There are times when I feel like the world belongs to me. There are times when I feel my lucky star is by my side and nothing could possibly go wrong. There are times when I took decisions so lightly that my life seem even not important although these are times when I enjoy it most. There are times when I feel creative, aweful, blissful, lustful, light as a feather, dancing and running all over the world, driven by an insastiable desire to discover, explore and think.
Then is euphoria, some say hypomania.

When do I really fall back onto the dark side of the moon? Why do I sometime recede back into melancholia, apathy, undecideness, some say depression? I recall those times when it happened: period, pill, pregnancy, so it's obviously triggered by progesterone. This might explain why I feared so much not only periods and pregnancy, but mostly progesterone pills. And no I was wrong it's not pain that was the most fearful but that dullness of life, when everything is grey, blurred, tasteless, tiring and scary.